What are periods?

A period is when the uterus sheds its lining, which then comes out of the vagina as blood.

‘Period’ and ‘periods’ are words for menstruation.

When periods start

Periods start during puberty. The first period is one of the important milestones in puberty.

Periods usually start between 11 and 14½ years, but anywhere between 10 and 16 years is considered normal.

Periods are likely to start soon if your child has:

• had a major growth spurt
• grown most of their pubic hair
• developed breasts
• noticed new or extra vaginal discharge.

If your child hasn’t started their periods by the time they turn 16, it’s a good idea to talk with your child’s GP. There can be many reasons why periods haven’t started by then, and the GP can help to figure out what’s going on and rule out any problems.

As your child approaches their first period, they might have a clear or white discharge from their vagina. This is normal. Sometimes this fluid leaks onto underpants. Some people like to wear period underwear or panty liners to absorb the fluid.

About periods and the menstrual cycle

Periods are part of the menstrual cycle. A menstrual cycle is measured from the first day of one period to the first day of the next period.

The menstrual cycle has 4 phases:

1. The cycle starts with the first day of a period. The heaviest blood loss is usually in the first 1-2 days of a period, but some people have bleeding for up to 7 days. People have different amounts of bleeding.
2. When a period is over, the lining of the uterus starts to build up again. This is the body’s way of preparing for a possible pregnancy. Also, egg follicles start maturing and getting ready to release an egg.
3. Around the middle of the cycle, one of the ovaries releases an egg. The egg moves through the fallopian tube towards the uterus. This is called ovulation.
4. At the end of the cycle, if the egg hasn’t been fertilised, the uterus lining starts to shed again.

The menstrual cycle is controlled by 2 main hormones – oestrogen and progesterone.

Periods and menstrual cycles in the early years

It’s very common for periods to be irregular and unpredictable for up to 2 years. This is because puberty hormones are still fluctuating.

In the early years, menstrual cycles can be as short as 21 days or as long as 45 days, or even longer. Menstrual cycles that start earlier in earlier in life usually become regular more quickly than those that start later.

About 2 years after the first period, menstrual cycles become more regular and predictable. They’re usually 25-35 days.

If your child’s menstrual cycles are still irregular 2 years after their first period, it’s a good idea to speak to a GP.

Once your child starts having periods, they can get pregnant if they’re sexually active. If you haven’t already started talking with your child about the physical changes of puberty, general sexual health and wellbeing and respectful relationships, this can be a good time to start.

Talking about periods

Talking about periods can be a tricky conversation. But your child needs to know what’s going to happen in their body before their first period.

Some of the things your child needs and might want to know include:

• what a period is and how often periods come
• how much blood will come out and how many days the bleeding is likely to last
• whether periods hurt
• what they should use for their periods – pads, period-proof underwear, tampons or a menstrual cup
• how to use and dispose of pads and tampons, or how to use period-proof underwear or a menstrual cup
• what to do if they get their period away from home – for example, at school, a friend’s house or camp
• whether they can swim or exercise during a period.

If your child isn’t keen to talk with you about periods, there might be another trusted family member or family friend they feel comfortable with. Or they could talk to their GP.

Pads, period-proof underwear, tampons and menstrual cups

Your child will need a supply of sanitary pads, period-proof underwear, tampons or a menstrual cup.

Before your child gets their first period, it’s a good idea to show your child:

• what pads, period-proof underwear, tampons and cups look like
• how to use pads, period-proof underwear, tampons and cups
• how to dispose of pads and tampons, or rinse period-proof underwear
• how to clean a menstrual cup.

You might want to suggest that your child carries pads, period-proof underwear, tampons or a cup. For example, they could keep some in a small bag in their school bag and sports bag.

Pads, underwear, tampons or a menstrual cup?
It’s probably easiest for your child to start with pads or period-proof underwear before they try tampons or a menstrual cup.

Your child can use tampons and cups at any age, but it can take some time and practice to get used to them.

Getting used to tampons or menstrual cups
If your child wants to use tampons or a menstrual cup, it might help to practise inserting and removing them. Between periods only, your child could try:

• putting a bit of lubricant or a tiny bit of petroleum jelly on the tampon tip
• using water as a lubricant for a menstrual cup.

It can also help to look at diagrams of the slope and shape of the vagina and use a mirror while practising.

Being comfortable with using tampons or a menstrual cup can be a big help in these busy and active years. But your child will work out what suits them best.

How many pads, tampons, period-proof underwear or cups?
Your child will probably need to use 3-6 sanitary pads or tampons a day, although it might be fewer on lighter days. In the first couple of days and at night, longer, thicker pads or pads with wings can be good.

Your child will need to change their pad or tampon every 4-8 hours, depending on how heavy or light the bleeding is. Tampons must be changed after 8 hours.

Your child will need to use 1-2 pairs of period-proof underwear each day, depending on how heavy their bleeding is and how absorbent the pants are. Period-proof underwear needs to be washed and dried between uses, so your child might need 4-6 pairs to get through their period.

Your child will need 1-2 menstrual cups. Cups can be worn for up to 12 hours but might need to be emptied and washed more often, depending on how heavy bleeding is. They need rinsing out between uses.

Keeping track of periods

It’s good for your child to keep track of their periods with an app, calendar or diary. If your child’s periods are fairly regular, an app or calendar can help them know when their period is likely to come. This way they can prepare for things like sleepovers, school camps or swimming carnivals.

Period symptoms and pain

When your child’s period is coming, they might have a range of physical symptoms, including sore breasts, pimples and greasy hair. Your child might also have a sore abdomen, back or legs, feel sick or have diarrhoea.

To help with period pain and other symptoms, your child could try:

• taking pain medicine, including anti-inflammatory medicines
• putting a hot water bottle on their lower stomach
• walking or other light exercise
• eating smaller meals more often to reduce stomach swelling and soreness
• resting and relaxing, particularly with their legs elevated, or lying on one side with knees bent
• lightly massaging their lower abdomen
• having warm drinks like hot milk or herbal tea.

Painful periods and other symptoms are common. But if period pain can’t be managed with the strategies listed above or if it disrupts everyday activities, your child should see their GP. There are safe and effective hormone treatments that regulate, pause or stop periods.

Mood changes before and during periods

Many people will experience mood changes just before or during the first few days of their periods. These changes can include being a bit irritable or more sensitive, or feeling angry, anxious or even depressed.

This can be hard for your child and the rest of the family to cope with. Giving your child a bit more privacy and space around this time can make it easier for everyone, without making a big deal about it.

If your child’s mood changes are upsetting or disrupting their everyday life, your child might like to see a health professional, like their GP.

Periods and children with disability, autism and other additional needs

Periods can be especially challenging for children with disability, autistic children and children with other additional needs and their parents. If your child has moderate to severe intellectual disability, they might not understand why they’re experiencing changes to their body and mood.

Your child still needs to know about periods and the menstrual cycle at a level they can understand. Your GP or other health professionals involved in your child’s care can recommend resources you can use with your child, like books and visual aids. You could also speak to your child’s school about support.

You might like to read more about preparing autistic girls for periods and preparing autistic children for puberty.

Looking after yourself

If you’re feeling anxious or even a bit sad about your child starting their periods, you’re not alone. It’s a big development. It can help to share stories and strategies with parents or caregivers in similar situations, either in person or online.