What are babies doing at 3-4 months?
Communicating and feeling
Your baby is busy learning about emotions and communication. They’re starting to link what you say to your facial expressions. Your baby loves your face, but they might find new faces interesting too. Your baby also knows your voice and will turn their head to you when they hear you.
Your baby is starting to show more emotion themselves and might laugh out loud, smile when they see and hear things they like, and make sounds like ‘ah-goo’. They might even try talking to you in ‘coos’ and other sounds. When you talk, your baby listens and tries to reply. And when your baby is alone, you might hear them babbling to themselves.
Crying
Any extra crying and fussing usually settles at 12-16 weeks.
Playing
Your baby loves playing with objects and might also look closely at objects and shake them. And now that your baby is using their hands and fingers more, your baby might stare at and play with their own hands too.
Moving
When you hold your baby or help them to sit up, you might notice that they have more control of their head movements or can hold their head steady without support.
When you put your baby on their tummy, they might lift their head high or push up on their forearms or hands.
Seeing
Sometimes your baby might cross their eyes when they’re looking at things – this is natural in the first few months.
Your child’s brain develops connections faster in the first 5 years than at any other time in their life. Stimulating and caring environments with plenty of different activities help to build these connections and lay the foundations for learning, health and behaviour throughout life.
How can you help your baby grow and develop at 3-4 months?
Play with your baby
When you and your baby play together, your baby feels loved and secure. It also helps you and your baby get to know each other. Try these ideas:
- Sing songs, read books, play with toys, and make funny sounds together – your baby will love it!
- Put your baby on the floor to play, and give your baby tummy time – this builds your baby’s muscles and coordination.
- Give your baby different objects to feel, smell and taste or touch with their mouth – for example, an orange, cloth books or soft toys. Avoid sharp or hot objects, things that can cover your baby’s face, and choking hazards.
Smile!
Smiling at your baby makes them feel good, safe and secure. It also helps your baby’s brain develop and builds attachment to you.
Make eye contact
When you get your baby to follow your eyes, it encourages them to turn their head. This builds your baby’s neck strength and head control. Changing your baby’s position encourages them to turn their head to both sides.
Have a chat
Talking and responding warmly to your baby’s coos or squeals helps your baby learn about language and communication. When you talk and listen, look your baby in the eye and make facial expressions to help them learn the link between words and feelings.
Find a routine
When it feels right for you and your baby, it can help to do things in a similar order each day. A familiar pattern helps your baby feel safe and secure.
Get ready to move
- Give your baby plenty of floor time, and limit time in equipment that restricts movement, like bouncinettes, baby chairs and prams.
- If your baby has started to roll, always watch your baby and never leave them unattended. Your baby might roll into danger or reach for something dangerous.
- Make your home safe for your baby to move around in.
Sometimes your baby won’t want to do some of these things – for example, they might be too tired or hungry. Your baby will use baby cues to let you know when they’ve had enough and what they need.
Why do babies cry and how can you respond?
Sometimes you’ll know why your baby is crying. When you respond to your baby’s crying – for example, by changing your baby’s nappy when it’s wet or feeding your baby if they’re hungry – your baby feels comfortable and safe.
Sometimes you might not know why your baby is crying, but it’s still important to comfort your baby. You can’t spoil your baby by picking them up, cuddling them or talking to them in a soothing voice.
Never shake a baby. If you feel like you can’t cope or you might hurt your baby, gently put your baby down somewhere safe. Take deep breaths to calm down. Get support by talking to a family member or friend or by calling a parenting helpline or Lifeline on 131 114.
How to care for a 4-month-old baby and look after yourself
Every day you and your baby will learn a little more about each other. As your baby grows and develops, you’ll learn more about what your baby needs and how you can meet their needs.
As a parent, you’re always learning. It’s OK to feel confident about what you know. And it’s OK to admit you don’t know something and ask questions or get help.
It’s also important to look after yourself. Looking after yourself physically, mentally and emotionally is good for you, and it’s good for your baby. When you’re well, you can give your baby the loving attention they need to grow and thrive. You can also cope better if your baby is crying a lot.
Part of looking after yourself is asking for help, especially if you’re feeling stressed, anxious or angry. There are many people who can support you and your baby, including your partner, friends, relatives, child and family health nurse and GP. It’s a good idea to have a list of these people with their contact details. Put the list on your fridge, so it’s easy to find if you need it.
When to be concerned about baby development at 4 months
You know your baby best. So it’s a good idea to see your child and family health nurse or GP if you have any concerns or notice that your 4-month-old has any of the following issues.
Seeing, hearing and communicating
Your baby:
- is crying a lot and is difficult to soothe, and this is worrying you
- isn’t making eye contact with you or doesn’t pay attention to faces
- has an eye that’s turned in or out most of the time or doesn’t follow moving objects with their eyes
- isn’t making any sounds or responding to noises.
Movement
Your baby:
- isn’t lifting their head
- isn’t starting to control their head when supported to sit
- isn’t reaching and grasping for toys
- doesn’t notice their hands and keeps their hands in a fist most of the time.
If you notice that your baby is losing skills they once had, see a child health professional.
Also see your nurse or GP if you have signs of postnatal anxiety, postnatal depression in birthing mothers or postnatal depression in non-birthing parents. With help and support, you can manage symptoms, feel better sooner, and give your baby what they need to develop well.
Development happens in a similar order in most children, but skills might develop at different ages or times. If you’re wondering whether your baby’s development is on track, or if you feel that something isn’t quite right, it’s best to get help early. See your child and family health nurse or GP.
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