Good mental health for kids & teens with disability

What is mental health for children and why does it matter?

Mental health is the way kids and teens think and feel about themselves and the world around them.

If your child has good mental health, they feel good about themselves and feel loved, safe and secure in their environment.

Good mental health is an important part of healthy development. For young people with disability or chronic conditions, it can help with:

understanding and managing emotions
building healthy relationships
learning, playing and being creative
adapting to change
coping with challenges and stresses
managing their conditions.

How to care for your child’s mental health when they have disability

If your child has disability or a chronic condition, there are many practical things you can do to care for their mental health. Many of these are things you’d do for all children and teenagers. You can read more in:

There are also extra things you can do.

Focus on your child’s strengths and help them handle challenges

When you focus on your child’s strengths and help them handle challenges, it can be good for their confidence and self-esteem.

Here are ideas:

Celebrate your child’s strengths and the things they can do.
Talk openly about the challenges your child might face.
Acknowledge that your child might feel sadness about things they can’t do.
Help your child to find flexible, creative ways to be involved in things they love.

Make sure your child has supportive environments

Supportive environments make it easier for your child to feel included and take part in activities. This can help your child develop the emotional resilience they need to navigate medical treatments, social challenges and everyday life with disability or a chronic condition.

Home and family life

Modify your home to support your child’s independence – for example, with grab rails, an accessible shower, a lower sink, or room to move around furniture.
Store medical supplies and equipment in ways that protect your child’s dignity and give them a sense of control. For example, when your child is old enough to manage their own medicine, store it safely somewhere they can easily reach.
Involve your child in family decisions, routines and traditions.
Support your child’s relationship with their siblings by looking for ways that they can all play, have fun and interact together.
Have consistent family rules and consequences that apply to everyone. This sends the message that everyone is important and equal.

School and other settings

Work closely with your child’s school to ensure that the school has learning supports and adjustments that suit your child’s needs.
Advocate for your child and encourage your child to self-advocate.

Use routines

Routines are good for kids and teens. Routines can help your child get things done and feel more secure, more in control, better able to cope with challenges and less overwhelmed or anxious.

Here are ideas:

Create daily routines that include time to manage your child’s condition – for example, medicines at the same time each day, rests or breaks between activities.
Create a routine or a step-by-step guide to help your child prepare for appointments – for example, what happens and what to do before, during and after the appointment.
Create visual schedules of your child’s routines. These can encourage your child to follow their routines independently.

Encourage conversations about your child’s condition

Open and supportive conversations can help your child feel empowered and less alone.

Here are ideas:

Talk with your child about their disability or condition in honest, age-appropriate ways.
Help your child decide how and when to share information about their condition.
Encourage your child to talk about how they think and feel about their condition.
Listen without jumping in to fix things.

Encourage your child to be physically active

Good physical health is important for mental health. Being physically active can give your child energy and help them feel confident, manage stress and sleep well.

Here are ideas:

Talk to your child’s health professionals about activities that are likely to suit your child.
Look into adaptive or inclusive sports, movement programs or physical activities that are modified to suit your child’s needs and abilities.
Focus on fun and enjoyment, not on performance or competition.
Join in as a family when you can. You could try a shake it out or move with the room activity.

Help your child learn to manage their emotions

Understanding, expressing and managing emotions is important for your child’s wellbeing. It can help your child control impulses, behave positively and bounce back after strong emotions.

Here are ideas:

Let your child know it’s OK to feel frustration, sadness, anger or fear about life with a disability or chronic condition.
Help your child label their feelings. For example, ‘It makes sense that you’re feeling left out – you really wanted to go today’.
Model self-compassion. Show your child that it’s OK to be kind to yourself, especially on hard days.

Help your child make friends and connect with others

Friendships and community connections help children feel that they belong and feel good about themselves.

Here are ideas:

Organise get-togethers with peers in familiar environments where your child feels comfortable and there are fewer challenges for them to navigate.
Help your child build friendships based on shared interests. For example, they could join sports teams or hobby groups that welcome children with disability or chronic health needs.
Talk about social situations ahead of time. You could prepare your child for starting conversations, responding to questions about their condition or disability, or taking a break if they feel unwell.
If friendships change because of illness, let your child know it’s OK to feel sad or angry.

Build your child’s independence

Independence is about taking on new responsibilities, being confident to try new things, and making decisions. It’s important for your child’s wellbeing and development.

Here are ideas:

Offer choices. Even small decisions can help your child feel independent. For example, these could be decisions about what to wear, how to organise medical supplies, or when to have a rest.
Help your child learn how to manage aspects of their condition in an age-appropriate way. For younger children, this might mean remembering to take their medicines. Teens could be involved in scheduling their own appointments or discussing their treatment plan.
Adapt your expectations to suit your child's strengths and interests as they grow and develop.

Nurture positive self-identity

Adolescence is a time when young people are working out who they are and where they fit in the world. If your child has disability or a chronic condition, this can be a complex experience.

Here are ideas:

Understand how your child sees their disability or condition. Your child might see it as fundamental to who they are or as just something they have to live with. They might have mixed and varying feelings about it too.
Celebrate your child’s individuality, creativity, kindness, sense of humour, determination and more. Let your child know these qualities make them valuable as a person.
Use language that affirms your child’s identity and abilities. The way we talk about difference, disability and diagnosis shapes how children see themselves.
Encourage your child to share experiences with an understanding peer support group. Getting involved with other young people who’ve had similar experiences can help your child understand how disability is part of people’s identities.