Being an advocate: what does it mean?
Advocacy is promoting and defending another person’s rights, needs and interests.
Children often find it hard to speak up for their own rights, needs and interests. They might need someone to speak for them.
An advocate is someone who speaks up for others. An advocate might find information, go to meetings as a support person, or write letters for another person.
You can be an advocate for your child.
Advocating for your child
If you think your child is at risk of harm, isn’t having their needs met, or is being denied their rights, you might need to advocate for them.
You know and understand your child better than anyone else. If people are making decisions for and about your child, you can help to make sure these decisions are in your child’s best interests.
A family member, friend, volunteer or professional advocate might be able to help you advocate for your child. If you’re interested in working with a professional advocate, you can find out about local advocacy services by contacting your community centre, council, library or neighbourhood house.
How to advocate for your child: steps
Step 1: understand the issue
Make sure you have a clear understanding of the issue your child is facing. For example, your child’s school might be having difficulty handling your child’s behaviour. So the school has decided that your child can’t take part in the learn to swim program or the school choir.
Step 2: think about what you want for your child
Thinking about your child’s needs will help you decide what you want for your child. It’s important to keep an open mind because there might be solutions that you haven’t thought of. Try to get plenty of information so that you can make an informed decision about what to do. You could ask other people what they think.
For example, you might want your child to take part in the learn to swim program or the school choir. Or you might want extra supervision while your child does these things.
Step 3: suggest a solution
Suggesting a solution is more effective than complaining. For example, you might say, ‘If my child doesn’t follow instructions, I could come and supervise’.
It’s also important to consider whether your solution might have negative consequences for your child. For example, if you supervise, would your child be embarrassed?
And you could think about timing. For example, would it be better for your child to take part now or do it next term instead? Or would it be better for your child to join a learn to swim program or choir outside of school to meet new people?
If the teacher or school has concerns about your suggested solution, it’s important to listen and work together on their concerns. For example, you could ask, ‘How do you think we can resolve this?’
Advocating for your child: tips
Know your child’s rights
You’ll be more effective as an advocate if you know your child’s rights and the rules of the system you’re advocating in – for example, your state’s education laws and the school’s policies, or any additional support your child is entitled to.
It’ll also help to find out who’s responsible for what in your child’s school or other services your child uses. This way you’ll know who to talk to and what you can expect.
If you have time, it can help to get familiar with the UN Convention on the Rights of the Child, which applies in Australia. You can also check the laws in your state and territory at Youth Law Australia.
Stay calm
If you stay calm and polite, people will be more open to your point of view. It’s often best to ask questions and make suggestions rather than demand things. For example, a demand could be ‘Give my daughter a place on the school cricket team’. But a suggestion might be more persuasive. For example, ‘If my daughter gets a place on the cricket team, it’ll be great for the school’s reputation for treating boys and girls equally’.
If you’re struggling to stay calm, ask for a moment so you can calm down and gather your thoughts. If this doesn’t work, you could ask for a short break, or stop the meeting and arrange another appointment.
Get organised
Prepare for meetings and take a list of points and questions to meetings. It also helps to keep written records of meetings, emails and phone calls. Include the date and time, who you spoke with or met, and what you discussed. You can also keep relevant information and reports that support your case.
You could keep all these documents on a computer or tablet, in a folder, or both.
Get support
Speaking to other parents who’ve had similar experiences or joining a support group can help you with useful information and emotional support. You can also get support from a volunteer or professional advocate, who can explain the law and your child’s rights. This person can go to meetings with you too.
Children can learn to self-advocate from an early age. Helping children develop self-advocacy skills when they’re young prepares them to self-advocate as they get older. You can read more in our articles on self-advocacy for children, self-advocacy for teenagers, and self-advocacy for children and teenagers with disability, autism or other additional needs.