Help and support for single parents

About help and support for single parents

All parents need formal and informal support at times. Getting support is good for you and good for your child. That’s because it helps you look after yourself and give your child what they need to grow and thrive.

People can support you in your role as a single parent in 3 main ways. They can give you:

practical support to manage new or complex tasks and to lighten your workload
emotional or personal support to boost your confidence, mental health and wellbeing
information or advice to help you with parenting and decision-making.

Most parents – whether single parents or couples – need all 3 forms of support.

People who can help single parents

It’s good to ask for help if you need it and say yes when it’s offered. People like to help, and they’re usually glad if you ask them to do something specific.

If you’re finding it hard to think of people who might be able to help, you could try these ideas:

Friends – support from friends can sometimes be less complicated and emotional than support from family.
Local communities – you could try people from your child care centre, preschool or school, or a local club, religious group or support group that you’re connected with.
Work colleagues or people you meet studying or training – they can take your mind off parenting for a while and might be able to help sometimes.
Counsellors or other professionals – they can offer a safe, neutral place to explore your situation and help you come up with solutions and strategies.
Telephone helplines or online counselling – this might be good if you need to spend a lot of time at home or just need someone to listen sometimes.

Our support networks activity guide helps you work out where to get support, who can support you and how to expand your support. The activity has 3 steps – map your support network, reflect on your network, and put your network into action.

Ideas for finding support as a single parent

Here are ways and places you can find support as a single parent.

Connections and services in your community
Local papers, councils and libraries often have information about neighbourhood houses, playgroups and toy libraries. You can also get support and advice from child and family health nurses.

Other parents
You might be able to connect with other parents at parents groups, playgroups, preschools, schools, or sporting clubs and leisure centres. Try inviting other families for afternoon tea, playdates, walks and so on. When you talk to other parents, you might be surprised at the family challenges and changes they’ve been through themselves.

Local support and interest groups
Support groups for single parents can be helpful for sharing ideas, feelings and experiences with other people in the same situation as you. You can also join book clubs, craft or sporting clubs, charity organisations, religious groups or political groups.

Online forums and social media
Going online can help you connect with other parents from Australia and around the world. Many single-parent groups have forums or Facebook pages or groups. Just remember to protect your personal information when you go online.

Online parenting support services
There are many online services that can give you information and support. Some services also offer counselling. Online parenting support services include:

Parents who get support tend to use more positive parenting strategies, are better able to cope, and are more consistent in parenting decisions than those who try to manage by themselves.

Finding the right support as a single parent

When you’re looking for support, it can help to start by imagining the kind of help and support you’d like. Sketch out the ideal scenario, and then plan out the steps to achieve it.

It’s OK to have a few close friends or a large social group. Both situations are good for your emotional health and wellbeing, as long as you feel you’re getting the support you need.

You and your child will both benefit from having supportive, positive people in your lives. So surround yourself with trustworthy, encouraging and reliable people, who support your dreams, hopes and goals. And if there are some critical, unhelpful or even hostile people in your life, it might be good to keep them at a distance.

If you’re spending a lot of time caring for your child as a single parent, it can be hard to stay in touch with friends who don’t have children. Or you might have lost some friendships when you became a parent or during the separation or divorce. You could think about getting back in touch. You can let people know you’re sad you lost touch but you’re keen to reconnect.

If you find it hard to arrange child-free time, you could meet for coffee at a child-friendly café or the park so the children have something to do.

Getting financial support as a single parent

Many people find managing money and budgets difficult, and you might feel worried about money. As a single parent, you probably have 3 potential sources of income:

If you’re a single parent because of separation and can get child support from your child’s other parent, do so. You might need help or even someone to advocate for you. If there’s conflict with your child’s other parent, seek help from a family support centre – don’t try to do it on your own.

When you’ve worked out how much money you’ve got coming in, take the time to plan a monthly budget and get advice from people you can trust. If you need help, many community services agencies offer financial counselling. You can also use Services Australia’s Financial Information Service.