Children's sleep: 20 frequently asked questions

Children need enough good-quality sleep for health, wellbeing, growth and learning. There are many simple things you can do to help children sleep better. See your GP if you’re worried that sleep problems are affecting your child’s wellbeing, schoolwork or relationships. You should also see your GP if you’re worried that your child has a medical condition or illness that’s affecting their sleep.

Is my child getting enough sleep? How much sleep do children need?

If your child has good energy levels, feels refreshed, wakes independently in the morning at a reasonable time, and doesn’t complain of tiredness or sleepiness, your child is probably getting enough sleep.

You can check the recommended amount of sleep for children of different ages in these articles:

If you’re concerned about the amount of sleep your child is getting, see your GP.

My child twitches as they fall asleep. What’s happening?

These twitches are probably ‘sleep starts’ – quick jerks of the arms and legs that happen as your child falls asleep. Up to 70% of children and grown-ups have sleep starts. Tiredness, stress or lack of sleep might make them worse, so it can be worth checking your child’s sleep habits. If the jerks are repetitive rather than just 1-2 quick movements or if they happen throughout the night, you should check with your GP.

Why do I have to wake my school-age child for school?

If you have to wake your child in the morning, it might be because they’re not getting enough sleep for a school-age child. Most primary school-age children wake by themselves in the morning if they’re getting enough sleep. Check your child’s sleep habits, and always see your GP if you’re concerned.

My child snores and gasps at night. Should I be worried?

Snoring can be caused by a cold or a blocked nose. It’ll usually stop when the illness has gone.

If the snoring doesn’t go away and happens most nights, even when your child is well, it could be a sign of obstructive sleep apnoea. See your GP if your child has been snoring over a long period, stops breathing during sleep, gasps and struggles for breath overnight, tosses and turns at night, or sweats a lot overnight.

When should a child stop napping? How long should a nap be?

About a quarter of children stop napping by 3 years. Another half stop at 3-4 years. Most children have stopped napping by 5 years if they’re getting enough sleep at night. Naps can range from 20 minutes to around 2 hours, depending on your child’s age.

If your child isn’t tired at bedtime or is having trouble getting to sleep, encourage your child to have a shorter nap earlier in the day – for example, a nap straight after lunch.

What does it mean if my child wakes up grumpy?

The most likely reason for your child waking up grumpy is that your child hasn’t had enough sleep. But if your child is sleeping the right amount for their age, waking up grumpy might mean that your child isn’t getting good-quality sleep. If your child is snoring or very restless overnight, see your GP to have your child checked for a sleep problem.

How do I get my child to sleep before midnight?

Here are ideas to help your child get to sleep earlier:

Encourage your child to go to bed and get up around the same time every day, even on the weekend. This can help your child’s internal body clock get into a regular rhythm.
Discourage late-night eating, and encourage your child to have a healthy breakfast.
Allow plenty of time – for example, an hour – for your child to wind down before lights out. Encourage quiet activities like reading a book or magazine, drawing, writing, playing card games or doing puzzles.
Avoid digital technology use in the hour before bedtime. This includes mobile phones, tablets, computer screens and TV.

During puberty, children start to secrete melatonin later at night than they did in earlier childhood. This affects their circadian rhythm. It means that your child will want to go to bed later at night and get up later in the morning.

Your teenage child will probably sleep better and function better during the day with a set bedtime for school nights. You can find more information in our illustrated guide to better sleep for teenagers.

A regular and positive bedtime routine can get children used to falling asleep at the same time every night. It also helps to get your child up at about the same time each morning, including on weekends. A regular morning wake time can help your child stick to a regular bedtime.

What can I do during the day to improve my child’s sleep?

These daytime tips might improve your child’s sleep at night:

Give your child a healthy breakfast to kick-start your child’s internal body clock.
Encourage your child to get as much natural light as possible during the day, especially in the morning.
Encourage your child to be physically active.
Encourage your child to avoid caffeine – in energy drinks, coffee, tea, chocolate and cola – especially in the late afternoon and evening.
Make sure your child has a satisfying evening meal at a reasonable time, so they’re neither full nor hungry at bedtime.

My child gets overexcited at bedtime when my partner gets home from work. What can we do?

Your child might find it fun and exciting when your partner gets home. And your partner probably wants to spend some time with your child too. This is a problem only if it leads to noisy, active play that makes it harder for your child to settle into bed for sleep.

Talk with your partner about a family routine that includes quiet time under dim light leading up to your child’s bedtime. For example, your partner might be able to read quietly with your child before lights out.

How can I move my child’s bedtime earlier?

You can use a gradual approach called bedtime fading. Starting with your child’s current bedtime, you do your child’s bedtime routine 15 minutes earlier every few days.

How can I get my child to sleep in their own bed?

If your child likes to sleep somewhere other than their own bed and you want to change this, you can look at changing your child’s bedtime routine and sleep habits. It’s a good idea to explain your plans to your child first.

Here are ideas to help your child fall asleep in their own bed and stay in their own bed overnight:

Set up a regular bedtime routine – for example, bath, story and bed.
Think about timing. If your child is taking a long time to get to sleep, you might be putting your child to bed too early.
Check that your child’s bedroom is dimly lit and quiet.
Encourage your child to play in their bedroom during the day so they feel comfortable in that room.
Encourage good daytime habits – for example, getting plenty of sunlight and exercise.
Praise your child when you notice they’re trying to make changes to sleep patterns. You could also try a reward chart.

If you’re making changes to your child’s bedtime routines and sleep habits, try to be consistent. For example, if your child wants to sleep in your bed during the night, calmly return your child to their bed. Do this as many times as it takes until your child stays in bed.

How do I deal with my child’s fears and worries at bedtime?

You could try sleep relaxation strategies to handle bedtime worries. For example, talk about your child’s fears together or get your child to try writing their thoughts in a journal. Breathing exercises and muscle relaxation exercises might also help.

How do I stop my child from calling out and getting out of bed at night?

If your child is calling out and getting out of bed a lot, it can help to set up a bedtime routine and do a bedtime check that your child has done all the things that might cause calling out later. Has your child had a drink? Been to the toilet? Brushed teeth? Once your child is in bed, let your child know that you expect them to stay quietly in their bed until sleep comes. But always go to your child if something is wrong or they need your help.

What do I do about my child’s head-banging and rocking to sleep?

It’s common to see young children head-banging, body-rocking and head-rolling at bedtime or during the night. Most children stop this behaviour by 5 years.

If your child is developing well in all other ways, you could work on ways to reduce the noise and keep your child safe. For example, you could move the bed away from the wall and check and tighten the bed screws. Sometimes moving the mattress onto the floor in the middle of the room can ease the disruption to the rest of the family.

See your GP if head-banging, body-rocking and head-rolling happen a lot through the night or are particularly intense, or if you’re worried.

My 3-year-old asks for bottles of milk overnight. What should I do?

This is probably happening because your child has a habit of needing a bottle to fall asleep. When your child wakes and can’t get back to sleep during the night, they call for a bottle.

If your child uses a bottle only at night and is weaned from daytime feeds, check out our article on night-weaning.

If your child still has a bottle during the day, check out our article on weaning off the bottle.

It’s recommended that you wean your child off the bottle by the time they’re 12 months old. At this age, your baby can keep breastfeeding or drink from a cup instead. Bottle-feeding after 12 months can increase children’s risk of tooth decay, especially if children are settled in bed with a bottle. It can also increase the risk of obesity.

My child sleepwalks. What should I do?

You can start by checking that your child is getting enough sleep. An earlier or more regular bedtime might reduce sleepwalking.

If your child is sleepwalking, make sure they’re safe by clearing obstacles from the bedroom and hallways, locking the front and back doors, removing trip hazards and checking there are no sharp objects around.

Around 7-15% of children sleepwalk, and many sleep talk too. Usually, it’s nothing to worry about. Children often grow out of these habits in the teenage years, but see your GP if you’re worried.

My child sometimes wakes up distressed, crying and inconsolable. What should I do?

If your child won’t respond to comforting or soothing but is otherwise well, your child might be having a night terror. Stay calm and avoid waking or touching your child unless your child is at risk of hurting themselves. Night terrors can be distressing to watch, but they don’t harm your child, and your child won’t remember them in the morning.

If you’re worried about your child’s health or wellbeing or the night terrors seem prolonged or violent, see your GP.

What should I do when my child has a nightmare?

If your child wakes up after a nightmare, explain that it was a bad dream. Let your child know that everything is OK and they’re safe. A kiss and a cuddle might help your child settle again. You could also think about things that are happening during the day – like watching a scary TV show – that might be causing the nightmares.

It can be a good idea to seek professional advice if your child is having recurrent or frequent nightmares and is also having a lot of anxiety during the day. Also seek help if your child has been through a traumatic event and is having nightmares about it.

My autistic child has poor sleep. How can I help?

Sleep difficulties are common in autistic children. You can manage and overcome many sleep problems by using common positive behaviour strategies. You can also encourage good sleep habits for autistic children, including regular sleep times, positive bedtime routines and appropriate bedtimes. Sometimes you might need professional help from your GP, a paediatrician or a sleep specialist.

My child has a developmental delay. How can I help them sleep better?

You can manage and overcome many of your child’s sleep issues using common bedtime positive behaviour strategies. A regular and predictable bedtime routine will help your child know that it’s time for sleep. Telling your child that you expect them to stay in bed will reinforce the message.

You might also try strategies like camping out or returning your child to bed. Some nights you might need to take your child back to bed several times. Talk to your health professional if you’re worried.

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