What are habits?

A habit is a behaviour that children do over and over again, almost without thinking.

Children’s habits usually involve touching or fiddling with parts of their faces or bodies. Sometimes children are aware of their habits, and sometimes they aren’t.

Common habits in children

Common habits in children are:

• sucking a finger, thumb or dummy
• putting their fingers or hands in their mouths
• biting or picking at nails
• twirling and pulling hair
• picking their noses or sores
• picking at their lips or the insides of their cheeks
• chewing objects like pencils and clothing
• grinding teeth.

Why do children’s habits start?

Habits can be comforting for children. Sucking is a good example. As toddlers leave behind the baby stage, habits like thumb-sucking can be a way of soothing stress or anxiety.

Sometimes habits happen because children are bored. That is, the behaviour is just how children entertain themselves. For example, children are more likely to bite their nails while watching TV or doing nothing at all than when they’re feeling anxious.

Sometimes habits start for practical reasons but keep going when the practical reasons have gone. For example, young children with colds often pick their noses to clear them. Children who keep picking even after they’ve learned to blow their noses probably have habits.

You’re a role model for your child. If you see your child starting a habit, perhaps ask yourself whether it’s one of your own habits. For example, nail-biting might be passed on within a family.

Some behaviour might look like a habit but have a medical cause. For example, if a child suddenly starts pulling or hitting an ear and is also upset, it might be because they have an ear infection or are teething. Pulling at hair, eyebrows and eyelashes can be a sign of anxiety or other emotional problems.

How to stop habits in children

Most habits go away by themselves. But if your child’s habit is getting in the way of everyday activities or is causing harm, you might want to do something about it.

For example, sucking thumbs or fingers is common and often not a problem. But your child might be sucking fingers all the time. If this is getting in the way of talking or eating, or your child is being teased by peers because of it, it could be time to stop the habit.

Tips to stop habits

• Help your child understand the behaviour and involve them in coming up with a solution. For example, ‘I wonder what you can do instead of picking your nose so you’re not spreading germs?’
• Gently remind your child about the habit when it happens.
• Distract your child or encourage them to do something else. For example, you could encourage your child to play with a toy that has moveable parts while watching television. Or you could suggest a hand game like ‘Incy Wincy Spider’.
• If your child has a pair of habits, like sucking a thumb and pulling hair, focus on stopping one of them. You might find that if you can stop the thumb-sucking, the hair-pulling might also stop.

Praise will go a long way towards stopping habits. For example, you can say, ‘It’s great that you remembered your fidget toy. I can hear your words clearly when your fingers aren’t in your mouth’.

When to get help for children’s habits

If thumb-sucking and finger-sucking go on over many years, they can become a problem for children’s teeth development. If your child is still thumb-sucking or finger-sucking beyond 4 years, talk to a pharmacist about options like paint-on solution. If you’re concerned that the habit is causing dental problems, talk to your dentist.

If you think anxiety might be the reason behind a habit, you might need to deal with the cause of the anxiety. Talk to your GP about getting a referral to another health professional. For example, a psychologist can help your child learn simple steps to stop the habit.

Habits in children with disability, autism or other additional needs

Children with disability, autistic children or children with other additional needs might have more habits than typically developing children, or their habits might be more pronounced. A psychologist or another specialist experienced with additional needs can help if you’re concerned about your child’s habits.

Is it a habit or a tic?

Tics aren’t habits. Tics are sudden, repetitive and uncontrollable movements and sounds. Examples include repeated blinking, face twitches, arm jerks and grunts.

A child might be able to stop a tic for a short time, but it will come back when the child stops thinking about it. If you feel a tic is distressing for your child, it’s best to seek help from a health professional. Your GP is always a good place to start.