Responsible mobile phone use: kids & teens

About responsible mobile phone use

If you’re thinking about a mobile phone for your child, or your child already has a phone, it’s important to think about how you’ll help your child learn to use the phone responsibly.

Responsible mobile phone use is about:

sticking to family rules about phone use
managing costs by keeping track of call, text and data usage
keeping the phone charged and safe and not losing or damaging it
being safe and respectful in calls, texts and social media posts.

Role-modelling responsible mobile phone use

You can encourage your child to use their mobile phone responsibly by modelling healthy and responsible phone use yourself.

To start with, you could think about your own technology use. For example, if you want family meals or other activities to be phone free, you could make a point of switching off your phone at these times. This sets a great example for your child.

It’s a good idea to talk with your child about having phone-free time regularly. Some families like to have phone-free afternoons or days for the whole family. Others try to take a no-internet holiday every now and then – for example, on a camping trip.

Rules for mobile phone use

It’s a good idea to discuss and agree on mobile phone rules with your child. These might be rules about what your child can use their phone for, where and when they can use it, and how much they can spend on usage.

Here are some examples of mobile phone rules for your child:

What: your child must answer your calls and texts. Your child can also use their phone to contact friends and listen to music. Your child can’t use the phone to watch movies online. Depending on your child’s age, they must ask you before downloading new apps.
Where: your child can use their phone on the way to Grandma’s, but it must stay in their bag at her house.
When: your child can use their phone during the day and early evening, but not between 9 pm and 7 am.
How much: your child can use the plan’s monthly allowance, but there won’t be any extra payments if they run out of minutes or data.

Here are some examples of mobile phone rules for the whole family:

Mobile phones are either switched off or not used during family meals.
Mobile phones stay out of bedrooms after a time you agree on.
Mobile phones and other devices are charged in a family area overnight.
Mobile phones are put down when you’re talking face to face with each other.

You might find it helps to create an agreement that both you and your child sign. You could make this part of a family media plan covering all types of devices and media use. If you choose to have a formal agreement, it’s a good idea to revise it together regularly to make sure it still meets your needs and your child’s needs as they get older.

You might also want to talk about and agree on consequences if your family’s mobile phone rules are broken – by your child, or by you.

You can guide your child towards positive mobile phone use. For example, you could encourage your child to take a photo of one nice thing that happens each day to share with you that evening, or use their phone to edit photos or learn a language.

Managing mobile phone costs

When your child first gets a mobile phone, you’ll probably need to help them learn how to manage costs so they don’t run up big bills. For example, you can:

show your child how to check how much call, text and data allowance is left
help your child switch off unnecessary settings that use up data, like automatic downloads
explain that your child should use wi-fi to download content like videos, to avoid going over the data limit.

Keeping the mobile phone safe and charged

Responsible mobile phone use involves keeping the phone safe and undamaged.

You’ll need to talk with your child about how to keep a mobile phone safe – for example, your child might need a phone cover and a screen protector. A phone detector feature can be helpful in case your child loses the phone.

It’s also a good idea to agree with your child on how you’ll deal with replacing a lost or damaged mobile phone. For example, will you or your child pay?

If your child is younger – or just a bit forgetful – you might need to remind them that it’s their responsibility to keep the mobile phone charged.

Most schools have rules about mobile phones at school. Many schools require phones to be switched off so they can’t be used during class or in the playground. It’s important for your child to stick to the school’s rules about mobile phone use.

Safe and respectful mobile phone use

If your child uses their mobile phone to communicate independently with others or access the internet, it increases the risk that your child will come across content that bothers them. It also exposes your child to risks like cyberbullying, sexting, inappropriate content, and contact with strangers.

You can help protect your child from risky or inappropriate content and activities by teaching your child about internet safety.

You can also talk with your child about:

managing safety and privacy settings on their phone – for example, checking that social media profiles are private and locking the phone with a pin
not entering personal details like name, address or date of birth into online accounts or forms
accepting new social media friend requests only from people they know face to face
checking which apps use location services and switching off unnecessary ones. This can ensure that your child isn’t showing their location to nearby people that they don’t know.

Your child needs to learn about using their mobile phone to communicate in a respectful way too. This involves not creating or forwarding nasty or humiliating emails, photos or text messages. Using a phone respectfully is an important part of being a responsible digital citizen.