What is muscle relaxation?

Muscle relaxation involves gently tensing and releasing different muscles up and down your body.

Muscle relaxation is sometimes called progressive muscle relaxation.

Why muscle relaxation is good for kids and parents

Muscle relaxation is good for your overall wellbeing.

Muscle relaxation can:

• help you feel calm and physically relaxed
• slow your heart rate
• lower your blood pressure
• reduce your stress.

When you feel calm and relaxed, you’re better able to use good judgment and make better decisions, especially in stressful situations.

Muscle relaxation exercises work best if you practise them regularly, even when you’re not feeling stressed. For example, you could do this exercise a few times a week or daily. The more you practise, the easier it will be to relax. And then when you do feel stressed, these exercises can help you to calm down quickly.

What you need for muscle relaxation exercises

You need 15-20 minutes, and a calm, quiet space where you won’t be interrupted.

It’s best to wear comfortable clothes and make sure you’re warm enough.

It’s also good to give yourself time and space to do muscle relaxation regularly.

You and your child can do muscle relaxation by yourselves, or you can take the time to relax together.

Many people like being guided through relaxation activities, especially to start with. This can make it easier to focus on your body. If you think this would work for you, you could make a recording of yourself saying the steps below. It works best if you speak softly and slowly, pausing between each step.

How to do muscle relaxation exercises

Get ready

1. Get comfortable. You can sit in a chair with your feet flat on the floor. Or you can lie on the floor.
2. Close your eyes. Breathe normally in and out.
3. Mentally scan your body from top to bottom. Notice where your body feels tense or tight. This will help you to become aware of how your body is feeling.

Feet

1. Focus your attention on your feet.
2. Breathe in as you tighten your toes and the muscles in your feet and ankles. If you’re sitting, you can dig your toes into the carpet or floor.
3. Breathe out as you relax the muscles in your toes, feet and ankles.
4. Repeat.
5. Pause and notice how relaxed your feet feel.

Legs

1. Focus your attention on your legs.
2. Breathe in as you point your feet down to tense the muscles in your calves.
3. Breathe out as you relax your muscles.
4. Repeat steps 2 and 3.
5. Breathe in as you tense the muscles in your thighs.
6. Breathe out as you relax your muscles.
7. Repeat steps 5 and 6.
8. Pause and notice how relaxed your legs feel.

Bottom

1. Focus your attention on your buttocks.
2. Breathe in as you tense your buttocks tightly.
3. Breathe out as you relax your buttocks.
4. Repeat.
5. Pause and notice how relaxed your buttocks feel.

Stomach and chest

1. Focus your attention on the muscles in your stomach and chest.
2. Breathe in as you tense all the muscles in your stomach and chest.
3. Breathe out as you relax the muscles.
4. Repeat.
5. Pause and notice how relaxed your stomach and chest feel.

Hands

1. Focus your attention on your hands.
2. Breathe in as you clench both hands into fists.
3. Breathe out as you relax your fists.
4. Repeat.
5. Pause and notice how relaxed your hands feel.

Arms

1. Focus your attention on your arms.
2. Breathe in as you tense the muscles in your lower arms.
3. Breathe out as you relax your muscles.
4. Repeat steps 2 and 3.
5. Breathe in as you tense your biceps.
6. Breathe out as you relax your biceps.
7. Repeat steps 5 and 6.
8. Pause and notice how relaxed your arms feel.

Shoulders and neck

1. Focus your attention on your shoulders and neck.
2. Breathe in as you lift your shoulders up as high as they can comfortably go.
3. Breathe out as you lower and relax your shoulders.
4. Repeat steps 2 and 3.
5. Breathe in as you lean your head back so that you’re looking at the ceiling. Tense your neck only if you don’t have neck problems.
6. Breathe out as you slowly move your head back to facing forward. Relax your neck.
7. Repeat steps 5 and 6.
8. Pause and notice how relaxed your shoulders and neck feel.

Face

1. Focus your attention on your face.
2. Open your mouth as wide as possible and relax. Repeat.
3. Poke your tongue out as far as you can and relax. Repeat.
4. Put your tongue on the roof of your mouth as hard as you can and relax. Repeat.
5. Clench your teeth so that your cheeks and jaw become tense, and then relax. Repeat.
6. Close your eyes as tightly as you can and relax. Repeat.
7. Raise your eyebrows as high as you can and relax. Repeat.
8. Pause and notice how relaxed your face feels.

Whole body

1. Take a deep breath in through your nose. When you feel that your lungs are full, take in a little more breath.
2. Hold the breath for 5 seconds.
3. Slowly breathe out through your mouth.
4. Pause and notice how your body feels.
5. When your whole body feels relaxed, continue to breathe gently in and out.
6. When you’re ready, slowly start to wake up your body. Wriggle your toes and your fingers. Stretch your arms and legs.
7. Open your eyes when you’re ready.

If you’ve got only a few minutes, try this muscle relaxation exercise on just your arms, shoulders and face. You’ll be surprised at how well it works.

How to make muscle relaxation work for you

As you’re doing the exercise, make sure to look after your body. Don’t tense a body part if you have an injury or you’re worried that you might hurt yourself.

This muscle relaxation exercise can be great if you haven’t been sleeping well. In this case, do it just before you go to bed. You might feel very tired after this exercise.

How to adapt muscle relaxation exercises for children of different ages

Younger children

You might need to do it this activity with younger children or guide them through it.

Here’s a muscle relaxation script for guiding your child through the activity. Remember to speak softly and slowly, and pause after you say each step:

• ‘Let’s sit so we’re comfortable.’
• ‘Close your eyes.’
• ‘OK, think about your hands.’
• ‘Take a big breath in and make a fist with your hands. Pretend you’re squeezing a lemon.’
• ‘Take a big breath out and let go of all the tension in your hands.’
• ‘Now let’s do that again.’
• ‘Think about your hands. Think about how relaxed they feel.’

Older children and teenagers

Your child might like to do muscle relaxation exercises independently. Your child could:

• use a recording of the steps or script above
• make their own recording
• download a relaxation app with exercises that work for them.

How to adapt muscle relaxation exercises for children with diverse abilities

Anxiety

If your child is very anxious, it’s good for them to practise muscle relaxation when they’re calm. This will help them develop confidence and skills to use muscle relaxation when they’re feeling anxious.

Autism

Your child might need you to:

• repeat the instructions or break them into smaller steps
• show them what to do
• use counting to guide them through the breathing part of the exercises.

With practice, your child might able to do muscle relaxation with longer or fewer instructions.

High energy levels

For children with high energy, relaxation activities work well when they include movement and your child's imagination.

For example, ask your child to imagine that they’re a lemon being squeezed and to tighten all the muscles in their body. Then ask them to imagine that they’ve turned into a glass of lemonade and to relax all their muscles at once, stretching out their arms and legs to release all the tension.

Learning or memory difficulties

You might need to repeat the instructions for your child or break them into smaller steps.

Restricted mobility

Your child can do muscle relaxation with the parts of their body that they’re able to move. For example, your child can do this activity using their hands, arms or face and skip the instructions related to feet and legs.

Sensory sensitivities

It’s good for your child to practise muscle relaxation in places where sensory stimulation is low, like a quiet, dim room. This will help to build your child’s skills and confidence when they’re not overstimulated.

With practice, your child might like to include more sensory information in the exercise – for example, brighter light or quiet music.