How raisingchildren.net.au talks about LGBTIQ+ people and families

On raisingchildren.net.au, we try to use language that includes, represents and respects LGBTIQ+ people and their families.

We:

• recognise that it’s important to think carefully about the language we use to describe people and their experiences in the world
• use the terms LGBTIQ+ or LGBTQ+ depending on who we’re writing for or about
• try to reflect and respect the diverse and changing ways that people in LGBTIQ+ communities describe themselves and their experiences.

We’ve consulted with experts, parents and young people about the language we use.

‘LGBTIQ+’ refers to a broad community of people with diverse experiences of gender, sex and sexuality. But LGBTIQ+ people often face similar types of discrimination. As a community, LGBTIQ+ people often work together to foster pride in who they are, advocate for themselves and celebrate their diversity.

LGBTIQ+: what these letters mean

LGBTIQ stands for lesbian, gay, bisexual, trans or gender diverse, intersex, and queer or questioning.

Lesbian
This is usually a person who identifies as a woman and is sexually and/or romantically attracted to other people who identify as women.

Gay
This is usually a person who identifies as a man and is sexually and/or romantically attracted to other people who identify as men. Women who are attracted to other women might also describe themselves as gay.

Bisexual
This is usually a person who’s sexually and/or romantically attracted to people of both the same gender and a different gender from their own.

Trans or gender diverse
This is a person whose gender identity is different from their presumed gender based on their sex characteristics at birth. For example, this might be a person who was presumed to be a boy at birth, but this is no longer their sense of themselves.

Some trans people identify as a binary gender (male or female) that’s different from their presumed gender. Others might identify with the broader category of ‘gender diverse’ or as ‘non-binary’, which means they identify as neither solely as a boy or man nor solely as a girl or woman. They might use other terms like ‘gender fluid’, which means they move across gender experiences and/or expressions. Or they might use the term ‘agender’, which means they don’t identify with any gender at all.

Some trans people might use non-gendered pronouns like ‘they’ and ‘them’ instead of ‘he’, ‘she’, ‘him’ and ‘her’.

Intersex
This is a person with innate physical sex characteristics that don’t fit medical and social norms for female and male bodies. Intersex variations might be present from birth or emerge during puberty or in adulthood.

Queer or questioning
The ‘Q’ usually refers to ‘queer’.

Queer is a broad and loose term for a range of various gender identities or sexualities. It used to be a derogatory term for LGBTQ+ people, but LGBTQ+ people have reclaimed it and now use it in a positive way.

You might sometimes hear the ‘Q’ in the acronym defined as ‘questioning’. In this context, it refers to someone who’s exploring their gender or sexuality.

+
The ‘+’ represents other words that people use to describe their diverse experiences of bodies, genders or sexualities.

How we use the LGBTIQ+ acronym on raisingchildren.net.au

At times, we might deliberately vary the way we use the LGBTIQ+ acronym.

For example, we might use:

• LGBTQ+ instead of LGBTIQ+ if the content isn’t directly relevant to people with an intersex variation.
• LGBQ (lesbian, gay, bisexual and queer) if we’re referring only to diverse experiences of sexuality.

If we’re referring only to experiences of gender, we usually say ‘trans or gender diverse’.

Gender, sex and sexuality: what these words mean

The LGBTIQ+ acronym includes and represents people with diverse experiences of gender, sex and sexuality. The words gender, sex and sexuality are interrelated, but they can’t be used interchangeably.

Gender
This is your sense of who you are – a boy or a girl, a man or a woman, both or neither. Gender is presumed based on a baby’s sex characteristics at birth.

This might come with a range of gender stereotypes, which are widespread ideas about how people of specific genders should behave. Gender stereotypes include ideas about who should do certain jobs at home and in the workforce, who should play certain sports, who should wear what, who should show certain emotions and so on.

Sex
This is one way to describe aspects of the physical body, chromosomes and hormones. Typically, a person is assigned a sex at birth depending mostly on the way their body looks.

You’ll mostly hear the words ‘male’ and ‘female’ used in relation to sex. These labels are strongly influenced by medical and social norms.

You might also hear words like ‘endosex’ and ‘intersex’. Endosex people have physical sex characteristics that are typical for female or male bodies. Intersex people have innate sex characteristics that don’t fit medical or social norms for female and male bodies.

Sexuality
This is how a person describes their experiences of romantic and/or sexual attraction to others. This might be attraction only to men, only to women, to people who are neither of these, to more than one of these, or to no-one.

Most people feel romantic and sexual attraction. But some people feel only romantic attraction, and other people feel only sexual attraction. Some people don’t feel romantic or sexual attraction. People who don’t feel romantic attraction might call themselves aromantic. People who don’t feel sexual attraction might call themselves asexual.

We use gender-neutral pronouns in our written content about non-specific children, parents and families. Sometimes examples of direct speech refer to specific genders and use gendered pronouns. Some of our video content features parents talking about their children of specific genders.