About depression
Children often feel down, are cranky or have negative thoughts. This is part of healthy development. It’s also part of learning to understand and manage emotions.
But childhood depression is more than just feeling sad, blue or low. Depression in children is a mental health condition that affects children’s thinking, mood and behaviour.
Depression and children with disability or chronic conditions: what to expect
Children with disability or chronic conditions are more likely to experience low mood and depression than their peers.
This is for many reasons. For example, children with disability or chronic conditions might:
- often be in pain
- feel different from their peers
- feel that their condition gets in the way of daily life
- experience bullying
- struggle with schoolwork
- experience difficult medical procedures.
Signs and symptoms of depression in children with disability or chronic conditions
Symptoms of depression in children with disability or chronic conditions are similar to depression symptoms in other children. But the physical symptoms of disability or chronic conditions can mask signs of depression like low energy, poor appetite and sleep problems. This can sometimes make it difficult to know what’s happening for these children.
If your child with disability or a chronic condition has depression, they might also:
- feel different from their peers
- feel that they can’t connect with others because of disability or illness
- say things like ‘I’m not good enough’
- complain that they can’t play sport or do schoolwork like their peers
- not take medicines or refuse to do other treatments like physiotherapy
- complain about pain more than usual, including headaches or whole body pain.
Our article on childhood depression takes you through general signs and symptoms of depression. It also explains practical ways to help children with depression.
Professional help for children with depression and disability or chronic conditions
Depression doesn’t go away on its own. You need to help your child if you think they have depression. Here’s what to do:
- Make an appointment to see your GP, and get a referral to a paediatrician, psychiatrist or psychologist. These professionals can diagnose depression in children.
- Make an appointment with your local area mental health service. You can find your local service by speaking to your GP.
- Speak to student wellbeing staff at your child’s school.
If your child is aged 5 years or older, they can talk with a trained counsellor by calling Kids Helpline on 1800 551 800, or using the Kids Helpline email counselling service or the Kids Helpline webchat counselling service.
If your child says anything about suicide or self-harm – like ‘I wish I was dead’ or ‘I don’t want to wake up anymore’ – you should take this very seriously. Seek professional help straight away from your GP or call Lifeline on 131 114. If you’re really worried about your child or yourself, call 000 and ask for help, or go to the closest emergency department.
Helping children with disability or chronic conditions manage depression
There are many practical things you can do to support your child with disability or a chronic condition through depression.
Many of these are things you’d do for any child with depression. They include modelling positive thinking, managing your child’s stress and making time for talking.
There are also extra things you can do to help your child with disability or a chronic condition.
Relationships and feelings
- Help your child think beyond their health. What are they good at? Where can they succeed? What’s important to them?
- Look into peer networks for children with disability or chronic conditions. If these networks run camps or playgroups, this can give your child the chance to socialise with children with similar experiences.
- Develop a plan that helps your child keep up with schoolwork and friends when they’re away for treatments.
- Support your child’s friendships and activities and help them find ways to make and maintain new relationships. For example, you could invite friends over or organise activities.
- Encourage your child to tell trusted friends about their disability or condition. This can strengthen their friendships and help them feel more supported.
- Help your child work out what soothes them or helps them cope. For example, they might like to be hugged or cuddle a favourite toy, or you could try doing a belly breathing or calming exercise together.
- Help your child learn how to manage their emotions.
- Let your child know it’s OK to be angry or frustrated, and encourage them to be kind to themselves when they feel this way.
Physical health
- Give your child choices – for example, with things like foods in a diet or physiotherapy times. Having a choice can give your child a sense of control. But children with depression can struggle with making decisions, so there’s no need to make your child choose if it’s hard for them.
- Plan for procedures. It’ll probably be easier for your child to manage stress if they know a procedure is coming up and have a plan for coping with it.
- Try to make treatments fun. You could play music or find ways to turn them into games.
- Give your child developmentally appropriate information about their condition or disability. Give your child more information as they get older. Without accurate information, children often imagine the worst.
- Make sure your child gets enough sleep, healthy food and appropriate physical activity. Your child’s medical team can help you with this.
Everyday life
- Have fun as a family. Spend time doing things that aren’t focused on your child’s disability or condition or that make it easier for your child not to notice it. You could try scheduling family time as well as one-on-one time with your child.
- Be consistent in the way you use family rules and consequences with all your children.
Looking after yourself
It’s important to look after yourself. If you’re meeting your own needs, you’ll be better able to meet your child’s needs too.
Here are ways to look after yourself:
- Contact a support program for parents of children with disability or chronic conditions.
- Talk to your GP.
- Look into respite care so you can have a break.