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Separated But still living under one roof Expand / Collapse
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Posted 5/03/2012 4:47:56 PM
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Hi all,

 

I’m from a Melbourne newspaper and am doing a story about how people are living with their exes and making it work.

 

I would love to talk to someone living in Victoria in this situation. Please email portellie@heraldsun.com.au if this is you.  

 

Thanks,

 

Emily

Post #66715
Posted 24/04/2012 11:48:28 AM
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Hi everyone, I know the last comment on this thread was about a year ago, but I have just hit this status - separated under one roof. If anyone is reading this thread please reply. Would like to talk to others in same situation. Thanks
Post #67410
Posted 25/04/2012 6:49:11 PM
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Great to know that it did work for both of you. However, as time goes by whether you like it or not the two of you will never be satisfied with that kind of set up, which means, either you or him will decide to move out. If you too can save the marriage in the future then that's great, but what if the other one would fall to someone? There might be lots of challenges and believe me it wouldn't be easy. As long as the two of you are okay for now then go for it, but in the case that one day ask for the total freedom I guess its better to consult the kids in a way that it won't be harder for them to accept. But anyways, heartbreaks hurt and no one can take it easy.




newborn romper
Post #67428
Posted 10/07/2012 2:15:29 PM
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i am a bit late in joining the forum. i too am seperated under one roof, and not sure how long i can continue this way. Trying to find out if i am eligible for any assistance. I have tried to call centrelink but am on hold for 90minutes, and i work so difficult to go in.
Post #68158
Posted 11/07/2012 10:19:09 AM
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This is my first post on this forum (I joined today - hope to meet other single parents as am lonely in Melbourne) saw this at top of list and had to reply.
My kids father and I broke up 11 years ago. We lived together for 6 months, then it was too difficult (initial break-up stress) then he moved out. He moved back in to my house 2 years later and stayed for 2 years...we never rekindled a relationship. I was a full-time student and yes you are definitely entitled to all the centrelink benefits of a single parent, you will just have to be persuasive to get them. I eventually did up a 5 page document outlining why we were not in any kind of relationship (address finances, family outings, sleeping arrangements, the more tedious and boring the better. It also helps if you say the situation is not long term..but just till the kids adjust or something like that. Who is centrelink to say how long it takes kids to adjust...could be years.) I then just reprinted this same document every three months and sent it to centrelink when they did their review. I also told them to do their job and setup a camera outside my house if they wanted...there was not much they could say to that. My ex found a girlfriend and moved out, as did I. Then 6 months ago we both became single at the same time and decided to move back in together again. Kids are now 16 and 11 and they love it. He or I may meet someone in the future and move apart again, but trust me, it can work long term for separated parents to live together and it is great for the kids.
Post #68175
Posted 16/07/2012 12:29:57 PM
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Hi, I'm a mum to 6. Ranging from 19 to 6months. I am about to entry into this. Living in the same house and being separated.
How do you work it with Centrelink?
I would move out but I have no money and its hard to find a house where someone will rent to a single mum and 6 children.

Thanks
Post #68260
Posted 10/08/2012 2:07:29 PM
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After a very rocky 20 years my wife and I decided to separate but as new arrivals in New Zealand from South Africa we did not have the kind of family support networks to provide the usual kind of backup that single parents need, and adding the cost of separating to the already high cost of emigration was just too eye-watering to contemplate – so we decided to stay in the same house and have been doing that for two years now.  Obvious keys to success are to separate finances, respect boundaries and create enough physical separation to make it work.  I imagine everyone would have to have rules about dating etc. and this is probably the hardest part.  But if the aim is to make the transition from married to single without destroying your children, then not having the luxury of being able to bring a date home doesn't even feature in the greater scheme of things.  

 

I also think you have to have a plan that moves you in the direction of eventually separating ‘properly’. 

 

In our case I am slowly progressing a plan to split the house into two completely separate living areas and at that point one or the other of us can consider buying the other out of their share of the house by renting out the space formerly occupied by the other.

 

The unexpected benefit is that you grow as a person and learn to be unselfish - perhaps the reason you had to separate in the first place! 

 

Life is like that sometimes.

Post #68975
Posted 17/10/2014 5:30:07 PM
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I have been having problems with my wife and have been together with her for over 16 years now, I do love this woman a lot that was why I got married to her but at times i did feel a little confused about this and had wondered if she has been true to the relationship…until i have found priestess Munak, A spell priestess whom i came across her website when surfing http://thespellpriestessmunak.webs.com. She told me that she was not being true with me..I did later find out that she has been seeing her ex boyfriend whom I have suspected I was overwhelmed and did not know what to do, although I still love my wife and we have 2 kids and could not see myself with anyone else, I did not want to lose her neither and Priestess assured me that she could help me with this problem,. I felt like leaving but I love her too much to just go away. So I contacted priestess on priestessmunak@gmail.com, there she gave me courage and guarantee that in 24 hours after she has cast the spell, that my wife will tell me the real truth and would feel remorse that would never made her go back to it ever again. To be sincere, I was a bit skeptical but I gave in. At the very time the spell lady said, my wife came with to me at 2:am her eyes full of tears telling me that something is tormenting her, that she feel so much guilt. I did forgive her and work a lot of things out and she has came back to her right mind of love for me her husband and we are now as happy as we have never been. and I fully gotten over the fact that she has cheated on me but sometimes we do need to forget the past and move on to a better future and without this priestess help I don't think it would have ever worked out. She is truly an Angel sent from above! I can’t thank her enough and I would recommend her service to anyone who is having a marital or love problem. I'm really thankful.
Post #77204
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