Raising Children Network: the Australian parenting website
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Involving kids in tasks and chores

By Raising Children Network
 
 

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Children watch what others do. They are more likely to get interested if they see their parents or siblings contributing in various ways.

 
  • Research shows that children learn in a variety of ways about family relationships, and when children contribute to family life it helps them feel competent and responsible.
  • Sharing housework can minimise stress in a family.

All families expect children to contribute in some way to family life, either regularly or when asked to do so. For some, the expected contribution takes the form of helping with younger children: helping to amuse them, distract them, protect them. For many families, the expected contribution is one of help with the work of a household.

Children can contribute in many different ways, ranging from going out to play when the adults need to do big jobs in the house, to being responsible for a routine household task (often called a chore, especially in the US).

The secret is in asking for contributions that you value and that suit your children’s age and ability.

Even young children can start to contribute if you choose activities that they are old enough to do. Starting with simple chores like helping tidy up toys still shows them that their contribution is important. 

Lots of encouragement keeps children interested in helping. If their first efforts aren’t that great, explain the job again and keep telling them they’re doing well and helping mummy or daddy so that they feel rewarded.


Researchers also think it’s better not to give incentives such as pocket money for doing jobs that contribute to the household. Giving children the idea that helping out makes you happy and makes them an important part of the family is more productive.

When you do decide to involve your children in tasks, think beyond them looking after just their own room or toys. For example, get them to help with setting or clearing the table. This is because tasks that show care for the family as a whole are more likely to promote a sense of responsibility and participation.

If your children are old enough, you can have a family discussion, which reinforces that the whole family contributes to how the household runs. Children over six years old can help decide which tasks they’d prefer.

Suggested tasks for different ages

2-3 year-olds

  • pick up toys and books
  • put clothes on clothes hooks
  • set placemats on the dinner table

4-5 year-olds

  • set the table for meals
  • help with preparing meals, under supervision
  • help put clean clothes into piles for each family member, ready to fold
  • help with grocery shopping and putting away groceries
  • hand you wet clothes to be hung out to dry

6-8 year-olds

  • water the garden and indoor plants
  • take care of food and clean water for pets
  • help carry garden refuse, under supervision
  • clean bathroom sink
  • wipe down kitchen benches
  • help wash and hang out clothes
  • help fold dry washing
  • mop floors
  • put away crockery and cutlery
  • dusting
  • take out rubbish
  • help with meal preparation and serving, under supervision
 
  • Last reviewed08-05-2006
  • References

    Gruse, J.E., Goodnow, J.J., & Cohen, L. (1996). Household chores and the development of concern for others. Developmental Psychology, 32(6), 999-1007.