Mum to everyone

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Jodes Kardol-Moore is the proud mother of five – soon to be six – children. In her 15 years as a parent, she says, her role as a mum has taken many different turns.

“I am 31-weeks pregnant. I realised one day as I was reading Practical Parenting that I am, or have been, in all ‘mum’ categories.

“I was a young mum. I had my first baby at the age of 17. Like the other young mums sometimes featured in your stories I too received ridicule from older mums and other people in general; the looks, the stares, the horrible comments. Despite this negativity I never regretted having my first child so young. She was a much-wanted and much-loved baby.

“At 21 I had my second baby. Again I was subject to disapproving stares and remarks, even from loved family members. But I was proud of my two gorgeous girls. They were my life. At 22 I got married to my daughters’ father, and we then went on to have our son. By the time I was 24 I was married with my own home and three adorable children. It was hard, but it was also the most rewarding job I could have hoped for. I loved my choice of career.

“After 18 years with my husband (we had been together from the age of 14), we went our separate ways. I was now the single mum. Having three children to look after on my own was not easy. In fact, I found it very difficult at times. I had a 14-year-old, an 11-year-old and an eight-year-old depending on me. But I still enjoyed being a mother. Again I was stereotyped, this time as the ‘single’ mum. With no family nearby and no close friends it was lonely at times, but I think it was my children who kept my feet on the ground.

“Today I am involved with a marvellous, loving and caring man named Mick. We were neighbours and good friends before we became a couple. Mick was a great support for me and my children. He accepted them as his own. They love him, and he loves them. We moved in together and became a new family.  Mick has two gorgeous girls of his own, so now I have another mum title to add to my list. I have become the stepmum. I have found it to be a lovely and rewarding experience. It’s been both joyous and stressful but I love it. I love Mick’s girls as if they were my own.

“Joining our two families has not been easy, but we have all adjusted well. Our children range in age from seven to 15. There are my kids: Tia, 15, Brooke, 12, and Brady, nine. Mick’s girls are Kayla, 10, and Tia, seven. By a huge coincidence we both have daughters named Tia! It’s very funny at times. We are a big Brady Bunch (and my son’s name is Brady!).

“Now, at the age of 32, I am about to be the older mum. It has been nine years since I last had a baby. Finding out I was pregnant was scary at first. But it was also very exciting. Mick and I had spoken about having a baby of our own; something special for us to share and a special baby that showed our love for each other. We had started to plan the ‘right’ time to have this little miracle, but it was only within a month of trying that we became pregnant! Having to tell our families about our new happiness was hard; I felt as if I was 17 again and telling them I was pregnant for the first time. As could be expected they were shocked and worried. But Mick and I were excited, and our little Brady Bunch was over the moon when we told them.

“Being 31 weeks pregnant with a baby girl to Mick is wonderful. She is due mid March – 15 years after my first baby (Tia will be 15 a week before the little one is due – another coincidence). We all shop for the new arrival as a family, and everyone helps me choose her new little outfits. The kids love to feel her kicking me, and we listen to the heartbeat together. They’re all greatly anticipating the birth of their baby sister.

“It has been wonderful to be able to share this pregnancy with all the children. My two eldest girls understand everything that is happening inside my body, and both have found it to be a great learning experience. They sit with me and read all my baby books and magazines, asking me great questions along the way. We have a lot of fun together. They call me their cool mum. I have the crazy coloured hair, the trendy clothes and listen to the same music they do. We are more than mother and daughters – we are friends.

“I’ve received mixed responses from different people about this pregnancy. Once I tell people that I have a 15-year-old daughter and that this will be baby number six for Mick and I, I get comments like: ‘Wow, you’re keen!’ Sometimes I even get: ‘Are you crazy? Why would you want to do it all over again? You’ll need a mini bus to cart them all around’.

“I’m still amazed at how negative and narrow-minded people can be and it seems that in the 15 years since I had my first baby, nothing much has changed.

“I love all my children more than life itself. I love being a mum. As a young girl I remember all I wanted was to be a mum. Whether it be in the role of young mum, single mum, step mum or older mum, one thing still remains the same for me: I’m a mum – a good mum. I give my children love, nurturing, friendship, respect, understanding … and lots of cuddles.

“I am so looking forward to sharing the joy of our impending addition, not only with Mick, but with all of our children. We are one big happy family. What more could I ask for?”

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