For around 15-20% of new mothers, postnatal depression (PND) becomes an overwhelming and powerful influence over their lives and their family. Sometimes women who are pregnant can also develop symptoms of depression. This is called antenatal depression.
How PND can make you feel
PND can mean different things to each mother but usually includes feelings of depression, anxiety, sadness, anger and difficulty coping that last for more than two weeks.
These feelings appear either suddenly or gradually, within the first twelve months of the baby’s life. No matter what each mother is feeling, PND can make it hard for her to find joy in her new baby and her new life. PND can also make a mother feel that she isn’t in control or coping with her baby and that she isn’t a good mother.
It’s normal for all mothers to feel anxious, tired or down at different times when they have a new baby, especially in the early weeks. PND is something that lasts longer and can be harder to explain.
Why motherhood can make you sad
Why would having a new baby and becoming a mother bring about such sadness, anxiety and despair?
There is no one cause of PND. There are several things in a mother’s life that are thought to combine to contribute to the development of PND. Hormonal and chemical changes in the body and brain after childbirth are thought to play a part, but it isn’t usually that simple. Other stress factors such as a demanding baby, lack of sleep and a difficult delivery might be part of it. It can also be other life events, previous depression, isolation, lack of support, childhood abuse and a difficult relationship with her partner or her own mother.
Effects of PND
If a mother is feeling depressed or anxious for an extended time, it can be very difficult for her to get to know her baby and to blossom into the mother she would like to be. Too often mothers hide their feelings because they feel they should be able to cope.
Studies are showing that if the mother and her baby are influenced by PND for a long time, the baby might miss out on the close and responsive relationship with his mother, which can have long-term effects on him. The extended families of women with PND also struggle as they attempt to help and support the mother. Sometimes the partners can feel they are to blame, and can feel inadequate or even depressed themselves.
The good news
Out of the sadness that is PND, there is good news. With early detection, support, counselling and maybe appropriate medication, most mothers do get better and can enjoy their baby and motherhood.
Learning about PND and talking about the issues before or during pregnancy can help to reduce the chance of a mother developing it. It will also help her to know what’s happening should she experience any PND feelings and symptoms after the baby’s born. This will help her start the process of recovery.
Asking for help
Some mothers find it hard to say how hard things are for them because they want to be seen as being able to cope and being happy with their baby. This can get in the way of asking for help, whether from a GP, Maternal and Child Health Nurse or family and friends.
The sooner PND is identified and the right sort of support given to the mother and her family, the earlier the process of recovery can begin.
Most women experiencing PND find that having someone to talk to can help in dealing with feelings. Recovery might also involve building a support network of family and friends. Seeing a counsellor or joining a PND Support Group with other women with similar experiences can be very important.
