Raising Children Network: the Australian parenting website
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Feelings: toddlers

By Raising Children Network
 
 
Along with empathy and pride, toddlers start to feel frustration, and this is one emotion you’ll be hearing a lot about!
Toddler looking guilty
 

What to expect

Your toddler will probably:

  • begin to feel embarrassment, empathy and envy some time between 1½-2 years
  • become more aware of being an individual between 1-2 years
  • begin to be more independent from parents
  • start taking turns in games from between 1-2 years
  • experience guilt, shame or pride at about three years
  • struggle to keep his emotions in check, possibly resulting in occasional tantrums
  • want to be in control and do things without help.

Your toddler will begin to compare his behaviour to others. He may start to feel and show pride at times, exclaiming ‘I did it!’ after building a tower of blocks.

By the age of three, your toddler starts to feel emotions such as guilt and shame. He’ll need lots of reassurance and support from you to help him understand these new emotions.

Your toddler is also learning to come to grips with a new emotion: frustration. He is likely to:

  • become frustrated – and voice this with gusto – when he does not get his own way
  • simply not understand why he can't have what he wishes
  • be quite bossy at times about what he does want
  • find it hard to wait for things or stop playing when it’s time to go home.

Play ideas to encourage the exploration of feelings

Play is one of the best ways for young children to express and manage their feelings. Great ways to encourage this include:

  • letting your toddler enjoy messy play with sand, mud or paints
  • giving your toddler the chance to act out feelings with puppets or toys
  • going to a park or open space where your toddler can run, tumble or roll around to let off steam
  • finding opportunities for play with other children.

The different sensations involved with messy play – the sliminess of mud, or gritty coarseness of sand – can help your child get used to different sensations and feelings. It can be a great outlet for his emotions.

All children develop at their own pace. If you are concerned about any aspect of your child's development, it is a good idea to visit your health professional.

 
 
 
  • Last reviewed11-05-2006
  • References

    Manning-Morton, J., & Thorp, M. (2003). Key times for play: The first three years. Philadelphia: Open University Press.

    Saarni, C., Mumme, D.L., & Campos, J.J. (1998). Emotional development: Action, communication, and understanding. In W. Damon & N. Eisenberg (eds), Handbook of child psychology, vol 3: Social, emotional and personality development (5th ed). New York: Wiley & Sons.