Partnerships with professionals
When you combine your deep knowledge of your child with the expertise of professionals in the field of disability, you are more likely to get a positive outcome for your child. Ideally, your relationship with professionals is like any personal or business partnership, and is based on:
- common goals
- trust
- shared power and responsibility
- appreciation of what each partner brings to the relationship
- respect.
In a partnership, decisions are made together.
Partnerships don’t usually happen immediately but take time and a lot of open, two-way communication. They begin, however, with the first meeting.
Who me – an expert?
Remember that you are an expert on your child, because you know him best. After all, you have a strong bond with him and an investment in his future. You probably also know more than you think about your child’s needs, because you know him as a ‘whole person’.
Communication: the key to a successful partnership
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Ask any questions you may have, even if the doctor or specialist seems rushed. If you need to know, you need to know.
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Write down your
questions before the meeting to help you remember to ask them.
- When you are given information verbally, it can help to repeat it back to the professional to make sure you understand.
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You don’t need to learn complicated professional jargon. Ask your professional to use language and terms that you are comfortable with.
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Keep notes about your meetings with professionals, so that you have accurate information for yourself, other family members, or to share with other professionals.
- Ask for important decisions or other pieces of information to be formally noted in writing for you.
- Be honest and share your concerns.
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Share any information that you think will help the professional work more effectively with you and your child, including information about your family.
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Give feedback about the relationship – both positive reactions and constructive criticism are useful and important.
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Discuss your own needs with the professional so they are taken into account in decisions about what is best for your child.
- In your role as an advocate for your child, try to see the situation from the professional’s perspective as well. When you have criticisms or strong negative feelings, express them tactfully and constructively and stick to the issue involved. Keep calm but at the same time make sure you make your point.
- When you are talking to services on the phone, make sure you know the name and position of the person you are speaking to in case you need to follow up later.
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Make another meeting date before you leave your meeting.
Make sure professionals listen to you. You have a lot of information about your child that any professional dealing with you or your child should want to know. If a professional doesn’t pay attention to what you say, you may want to find an alternative.
Working with different professionals
It was the best feeling when the three or four professionals who were working with Miriam not only knew her and our family but also talked to each other and shared ideas. Things made so much more sense then – they just fitted together. The worst time was when there was no communication between the people who saw Miriam. Not only was I on total overload and given too many things to do with her, but sometimes the advice and recommendations just didn’t fit or actually conflicted with each other.
Some organisations offer lots of different services provided by different professionals. Ideally the services are coordinated for each family by a case manager or family services coordinator (sometimes called a key worker or a primary worker). This person is your central point of contact for the organisations providing the services. A case manager or family services coordinator will also be an advocate for you and your child, helping you get the most out of the services you use.
If you move to another area, your case manager will help you make contact with services there, find out who will be seeing you, and possibly arrange to be part of a joint meeting with you and your new case manager.
Family service plan
Some services will develop a family service plan or individual program plan for your child. It will highlight goals, specific tasks, and a timeline with review dates. These plans work best when written in simple clear language and when your family needs are taken into account.
What if the professional leaves?
It’s always hard when you and a professional have worked to build a good relationship and then he or she moves.
Most services will ensure that your new worker is given background information about you and your child. But you will probably have to tell your story again. Think of this as an opportunity to educate the new worker about your child’s history and your family situation, and as a chance to highlight what you think is important.
You may regret the loss of the previous relationship, but sometimes a new professional can bring a fresh approach and innovation to dealing with your child.
