Raising Children Network: the Australian parenting website
  • Suitable for 0-8Years

Building good family relationships

By Raising Children Network
 
 

Good family relationships help your child feel secure and loved – the perfect situation for her to learn and grow.

Father with a toddler playing with playdough
 

Being a parent can be one of the most difficult (and rewarding!) jobs around. It’s not something that you can be perfect at. Most parents are doing the best they can for their kids while juggling keeping up with life, work, friends, managing a house, and lots more. Even for the busiest of parents, though, there are lots of great things you can do to develop good family relationships.

Good family relationships are more than just enjoyable for their own sake. They make children feel secure and loved, and that helps a child’s brain develop. And putting in time to improve the relationships you share with your child and other family members can help to overcome difficulties with eating, sleeping, learning and behaviour.

All good relationships in life have the same things in common. These ingredients are the basics for good communication and can be applied to relationships in all cultures, religions and family structures.

Spend quality time together

  •  Use time together, such as mealtimes, to talk and share a laugh.
  •  Have one-on-one chats with each family member to build and strengthen individual relationships.
  •  Do fun things together as a family on a regualar basis.
  •  Make decisions together about what to do for special events such as birthdays.

Positive communication

  • Talk about everything (even difficult things).
  • Listen with full attention to each other.
  • Make it OK to talk about feelings (even the bad ones).
  • Encourage each other with praise rather than being critical.
  • Work together to solve problems.
  • Disciple with love, patience and understanding. 
  • Show appreciation, love and encouragement through words and affection.

Work together as a team

  • Include older children in decisions about things like household rules and family holidays.
  • Share household chores.
  • Think about everyone’s needs when planning family activities.
  • Let children make some of their own decisions (as long as they’re still within the boundaries you’ve set and within their developmental levels).
  • Create rules around the house that apply to everyone.

Appreciate each other

  • Take an interest in each other’s lives. 
  • Include everyone in a conversation when talking about the day’s events.
  • Support each other in important events such as sports days and school concerts.
 
 
 
  • Last reviewed08-05-2006
  • References

    Bornstein, M.H. (2002). Parenting infants. In M.H. Bornstein (ed), The handbook of parenting, vol 1, 3-44. NJ: Lawrence Erlbaum.

    Rutter, M. (2002). Maternal deprivation. In M.H. Bornstein (ed), The handbook of parenting, vol 4, 181-202. NJ: Lawrence Erlbaum.